


Fired Up

by JaneTurenne



Category: Ashes to Ashes, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms
Genre: Anthropomorphic, Crossover, F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-28
Updated: 2012-05-28
Packaged: 2017-11-06 03:44:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/414337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaneTurenne/pseuds/JaneTurenne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A crossover (of a sort) between Ashes to Ashes and the Doctor Who ep 'The Doctor's Wife': Alex and Gene drive the Quattro to the Junkyard At The End of the Universe.  The Quattro takes them home.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fired Up

“This is all your fault!”  
" _My_ fault!”  
  
“You’re the one who wanted to go to bloody  _Wales_ !”  
  
“Well, how was I to know there was a rift in time and space in Cardiff?  Or that  _you_ would manage to drive straight into it?”  
  
“And now my bloody car has disappeared, and we’re stuck in...”  
  
“I don’t think I have, though.  Disappeared.”  
  
Alex and Gene both stop dead, and turn to face the owner of the new voice.  
  
“No,” she continues.  “As a matter of fact, I think I’m less  disappeared than I’ve ever been before.”  
  
The speaker is a young woman, barely over twenty, but with the kind of confidence in her stance that usually comes only with age.  She has jet-black hair cut razor-sharp just below her jawline, and arresting silver eyes, perfectly rimmed in thick black eyeliner.  Her lips are  _red_ , the reddest red Alex has ever seen, but they’re no redder than her dress.  It’s slick, PVC, nearer fetish garb than proper clothing, especially given how little it covers up, short and strapless and tight.  Her heels are black patent, totteringly high, and while Alex has always thought her own legs rather good as these things go, this woman’s pins are long and shapely enough to make DI Drake feel positively  _frumpy_.  
  
“I’m sorry,” asks Alex.  “Who are you?”  
  
“I’ll give you a hint,” she says, and  _stalks_ towards Gene on those impossible legs, with a calculating little smirk.  “I like it when you  _fire me up_ , Detective Chief Inspector.”  
  
Gene’s expression contains something each of ‘just inherited a fortune,’ ‘Christmas morning’ and ‘kid in a candy store,’ though the cumulative effect is greater than all three.  “I’m still not sure what’s going on, sweetheart,” he tells the stranger, “but that doesn’t bother me a bit.”  
  
“I think I do,” says Alex, “but I’m not sure I can believe it.”  
  
“More improbable than the junkyard at the end of the universe?” asks the woman, without taking her eyes off of Gene.  Her hands come up to straighten his tie.  He permits the liberty with a smouldering smirk.

  
“You want me to believe,” says Alex, sharply, “that  _you're_ the Quattro?”  
  
Gene blinks.  “No.”  
  
“Oh yes,” says the Quattro.  
  
Befuddlement clouds Gene’s brow for a moment.  She leans close, and stage-whispers into his ear, loudly enough for Alex to hear, “There isn’t one single part of me you haven't had your hands on."  
  
The befuddlement vanishes, and the hunger returns--if anything, more strongly than before.  “Oh,  _yes_ ,” Gene agrees.  
  
“So what you’re saying,” Alex’s voice grows a hint louder, “is that we’re trapped here, is that it?”  
  
“Somehow, that isn’t bothering me right now, Bolly,” says Gene, and his arm settles around the Quattro’s waist.  
  
“That’s quite enough,” snaps Alex.  
  
“I very much disagree,” says Gene, as the Quattro smirks that much more widely.  
  
Alex stomps the three steps to where Gene and the Quattro are standing, and forcibly tugs the girl off of Gene.  “We have a serious problem here,” says Alex, in her ‘I am in charge of this situation’ voice, “and there’s no time for any of this nonsense.”  
  
“Are you jealous of him, or of me, darling?” asks the Quattro, turning her smirk on Alex, who still holds her by the arm.  “I remember the way you pressed yourself all over me the day we met.  In your  _fur_ .”  She slides so far inside Alex’s personal space they may as well be standing on each other’s feet.  "I wouldn’t mind you refreshing my memory.”  
  
Alex turns to Gene.  “Your car,” she says, with distaste, “is a  _slut_ .”  
  
“You say that,” he says, “like it’s a bad thing.”  
  
“I say that like we’re never going to get home!”  
  
The Quattro sighs.  “Don’t you worry your very pretty little head,” she says.  “I can still get the both of you  _anywhere_ you want to go.”  She looks over her shoulder, and smiles lasciviously at Gene.  
  
“You understand the laws of this place?” asks Alex.  “You can really send us back?”  
  
“Mmm-hmmm,” agrees the Quattro, twirling one of Alex’s curls around her finger.  Alex bats her hand irritably away.  “I can make you think this has all been nothing but a dream.  I’m just  _that_ good, you see.”  
  
“Good, then!” says Alex.  “Do it. Send us back!”  
  
“Hang on, sweetness,” says the Quattro, grabbing Alex by the lapels.  “This won’t hurt one little bit.”  
  
*  
  
Alex Drake sits bolt upright in bed after what has to be the  _strangest_ dream she’s ever had, even here.  She stumbles into the bathroom, and looks at herself in the mirror.  
  
If she didn’t know any better, she’d  _swear_ she had some other woman’s red lipstick smeared across her mouth.


End file.
